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Babies are Weird

I know it's been 3 months since I updated. Would it help if one of my resolutions was to post more often?
eh.
I've been working tons at World Market, so the only interesting thing that's happened in Seattle has been Halloween. Beth and I had quite a bit of fun, decorating and getting dressed up, and even just seeing friends we hadn't talked to in months. I should post pictures... maybe I'll edit this with a few later.

Anyway, the point of the post: we've been in Virginia staying with Beth's family for the last week, and I've gotten more than enough experience with babies between Daniel and Conner. I've compiled a list of things I will be happy if I never have to hear again. Here, let me share it with you: "Twinkle Twinkle, Little Star," "Pattycake," and the ABC song; talk of poopy anythings, or the consistancy of baby snot; the words "uh-oh Spaghetti-Os" and the use of "pacy" instead of pacifier; Elmo; babies rattling things, mumbling, squealing, screaming, blubbering, crying, wailing, fussing, howling, wailing, screeching, or shrieking. Somehow all of this makes Beth want a baby of her own even more, which is something I will never understand. Yes, they can be cute - when they're not doing any of the above, or spitting up, or crapping all over the place. So, when they're sleeping, I guess. I do get the feeling that any child of mine will spend quite a bit of time sleeping, so I suppose I'm ahead of the game there.

Other than daily tiny-person-induced headaches, it's been a good week. I finally got to meet Beth's cousin Valerie, who has been stationed in S Korea for the last few years. I've geeked out with Beth's brother Chris and cousin Joe (another one, and nearly the same age as I) about computers and video games, played cards with her parents, and pet and played with their assortment of dogs and cats. It will be nice to get home next week, but this is the kind of holiday I never had with my own family. So, weird as it may be, I'm enjoying it.

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You have to ask what kind of geek I am?


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yeah, with comics like this one resonating throughout my being, it should be pretty obvious
We gave it our best shot. Senator Kerry today said that now we need to come together and heal as a nation. FUCK THAT. There's no fucking way I am going to come together with these homophobic, flag-waving, god-fearing, gun-toting, uneducated, isolationist, ethnocentric REDNECKS. We live in a country that's in a shroud of ignorance. We do not compromise or come together with them. We fight them and everything they stand for. We as a community have to take care of each other and respect each other because apparently our current government has no interest in that. They do not care about gay people, they do not care about sick people, they do not care about black people, they do not care about poor people, they do not care about the rest of the world, they do not care about our environment, and they especially don't care about a woman's right to choose. We may have lost the battle, shit we may have lost the war...but we are not losing our minds. WE ARE RIGHT...THEY ARE WRONG...just because we seem to be the minority doesn't mean we come together with them. We continue to fight…
Fat Mike

(because he says it better than I can)

The Book of Bush, Chapter 8

6 Then the seven news networks who had the public ear prepared to inform it.
7 The first news network sounded its verdict in favor of Bush, and there came wailing from the sane-minded people of the Earth, and their spit was mixed with with blood, and their signs for Kerry were hurled down upon the earth. A third of the earth was torn up for oil, a third of the trees were burned up to make room for cattle, and all the green grass was burned up, simply because it didn't agree with the Republican party.
8 The second news network sounded its verdict, and a great star, blazing like a torch, fell from the sky on a third of the rivers and on the springs of water in America--
9 the name of the star is Cheney. A third of the waters turned bitter, and many people died from the waters that had become bitter.
10 The fourth news network sounded its verdict, and a third of the ethnic minorities were struck down, a third of the gays, and a third of the teachers, so that a third of them turned their backs upon the country. A third of the day was without light, and also a third of the night.
11 As I watched, I heard an eagle that was flying in midair, and the eagle represented democracy. The eagle called out in a loud voice: "Woe! Woe! Woe to the inhabitants of the earth, because of he who has retained the office of president today!"

Anyway, what I'm really concerned about it what Bush is going to try now that he doesn't have to worry about re-election?
Obama in '08!

Do you have electile dysfunction?

Top 3 Signs Florida Is Getting Ready to Screw Up the Election Again (with bonus 33% more!)
1. Presidential choices on the ballot: Bush, Kerry, Matlock.
2. Floridians who refused to evacuate during four major hurricanes are suddenly fleeing.
3. Absentee ballots feature a choice between John Bush and George W. Kerry.
4. Palm Beach County voters have vowed to atone for their errors by voting correctly this time for Al Gore.
-- topfive.com

Hey, put down that porcupine and vote!
We keep hearing that the voters of Florida, Ohio and Pennsylvania are going to pick our next president, so we thought it might be a good idea to find out just how smart these people are. Here are some actual laws from the Big Three:

* Men in Florida may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.
* It is illegal to get a fish drunk in Ohio.
* In Florida, having sex with a porcupine is illegal.
* In Pennsylvania, it is against the law to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors.
* In Florida, you may not pass gas in a public place after 6 p.m. on Thursdays.
* In Ohio, it is against the law to ride a jackass faster than 6 mph.
* In Ridley Park, Pa., you cannot walk backward eating peanuts in front of the Barnstormers Auditorium during a performance.
-- dumblaws.com; Uncle John's Great Big Bathroom Reader; "Presumed Ignorant" by Leland H. Gregory III

Because I can't sleep...

I've decided to hail the return of Gdozilla with a fight card, to get you updated on his record (during those epic showdowns). What's that? Yes, Godzilla's back! You know, that guy in the big lizard suit, with the zipper running up the back that you can actually SEE? In the movies? The JAPANESE movies? With the bad dubbing? Remember? Godzilla! Come on, people, work with me here!

* Ebirah
Height: 164 feet
Mass: 25,300 tons
Powers/weapons: Claws, underwater adaptability
Fight record: 0-2

* Gabara
Height: 190 feet
Mass: 25,300 tons
Powers/weapons: Electric bolt gene-rated through power horn and released through arm
Fight record: 1-2-0

* Gigan
Height: 213 feet
Mass: 45,000 tons
Powers/weapons: Buzzsaw in chest, laser gun above the eye, can fly at Mach 4
Fight record: 1-2-0

* Hedorah (The Smog Monster)
Height: 197 feet
Mass: 52,800 tons
Powers/weapons: Energy beam from eyes, sulfuric acid mist, acidic mud, can change form
Fight record: 1-2-0

* King Kong
Height: 148 feet
Mass: 27,500 tons
Powers/weapons: Gets stronger from electricity, electric current from fingers
Fight record: 5-1-0

* King Ghidorah
Height: 328 feet
Mass: 33,000 tons
Powers/weapons: Flies at Mach 3, gravity beams from mouth, hurricane-strength winds from wings
Fight record: 1-4-0

* Mechagodzilla
Height: 164 feet
Mass: 44,000 tons
Powers/weapons: Attack beam from chest, laser beams from eyes, shield formed by spinning head around, missiles in fingers, throat, knees and toes
Fight record: 2-2-1

* Megalon
Height: 164 feet
Mass: 44,000 tons
Powers/weapons: Lightning bolt from horn, napalm bombs from mouth, drill hands that can burrow under the Earth at Mach 3, can hop very well
Fight record: 1-1-0

* Mothra
Height: 213 feet
Mass: 16,500 tons
Powers/weapons: Flies at Mach 3, strong hurricane-strength winds from wings, poison powder
Fight record: 1-1-1

* Rodan
Height: 164 feet
Mass: 16,500 tons
Powers/weapons: Flies at Mach 1.5, wings create sonic booms
Fight record: 3-1-1

You can't go home again....

Well, I'm at home, but it doesn't feel like it... My stuff is here, but I get the sense that I don't really belong here anymore. This is unfortunate, but I guess it's part of growing up. How will I feel about this place when I've been around the world for 4 months? Oh, in case you hadnt heard, I think I'm going to London. Did I post about that before? Hm. Guess my mind has been elsewhere.

For some good reading, check this out. I'm not saying it's enjoyable, I'm saying it's good. So read the whole thing, try to evaluate it fairly, then form your opinions about it. Then go here, and read this. This all especially pertinent to the ladies, and the guys who love theirs. Or, heck, even admire them from a distance.

I need to cheer up... Oh, this should do it:

Hey folks! Get ready for another round of SPAM Poetry!
This was at the bottom of an email advertizing a single's site that made it through my filter:
"donor bemoan andrea.
advisee centrifugate ammonium.
tough
who've madeira upraise schlieren
belvidere during stepson beta
brocade finger camouflage."

Isn't that profound?! :D

The 'click here!' address was http://loquatyostcarthaginianbingham.mezzaninetipsysnip.segwayfime.info/ss/
and the 'remove me' address was http://cottacroupierskirmishpraseodymium.berlinbluegrasstelexperipatetic.nicholaswaterfallmandrakecourse.snackert.info/goodbye/ Are those not the longest strings of nonsense you've read since Whittaker's last post? :p

Oct. 20th, 2004

I love Bethy

Free stuff?

So, I saw an post on a blog I read about a free computer or iPod, and decided to give it a shot. If you're willing to try it, click here: Free Desktop PC Referral Page, or click here: Free iPod Referral Page, Please at least register a username at the sites when you go. Sorry if this thing signs you up for crap, but they said it worked. And if you know me very well, you know I don't believe just anything I read on the internet. I'm inclined to believe that this works as I also saw the offer featured on TechTV (video clip here), where they explained how it all works.

Random quote of the day: "You'd think that at some point the little piggy that went to market might swing by the pharmacy and pick up something for the one with the uncontrollable bladder."

With our powers combined...

Ever wonder what would happen if we got together in, y'know, that way? Well, here you go, a handy LJ toy to tell you the result:
The Potion Maker
MrMunkeepantsium is a milky, runny blue gel derived from the flesh of a phoenix.
Mix with MrMunkeepants! Username:
Yet another fun meme brought to you by rfreebern


If that's not good enough, I found out that ABCfamily replays the classic Spider-Man and X-Men episodes on Saturday mornings, starting around 11... Oh, it's so wonderful! I'm talking about the cartoons from the mid-90s. Next weekend... check it out!

And now, to end with an hilarious quote from the news:
"It's too bad she won't be able to vote for Kerry, and hopefully on the day that Bush gets elected she'll burn in hell!"
-- anonymous caller to the husband of a Madison, Wis., woman whose paid obituary in Madison's two daily newspapers urged people honoring her memory to vote for John Kerry. (The Associated Press)

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